I guess I joined the Cool Kids Time Travel Club with Bryan, Doug, and Scott. (Presumably other people as well, but I think these three are probably the most prominent members.) And since I joined the club I have to follow the posts, which brings us to the title...Grant Me the Serenity.
Now, I have no idea what serenity has to do with time travel, but I admit my knowledge of time travel is fairly limited. I know only what I've seen in movies and what I've read on Bryan's page. (I also know the secret formula for time travel that leaves behind no paradoxes, but that was an accidental discovery, and I already said I'm the only person in the world who can be trusted with this information. Don't bother asking me. I won't share.) So how exactly I'm supposed to carry on talking about time travel when I haven't even seen the very first Back to the Future movie I don't know yet.
What I do know is this: Serenity was the name of a movie about a spaceship called Serenity in which a psychic girl is hiding from the government because they are after her and she knows something about Miranda, which was a planet they all but destroyed with a scientific experiment that left the survivors less human and something more like Space Zombies. I think they called them Grievers or something. There were some fight scenes, lots of bad dialog with hideous accents, and pretty sub-par acting that left me giggling at moments that were, I'm fairly certain, intended to be of a serious nature. At one point a woman actually complained to the captain that she hadn't "had nothing twixt my legs twern't battery operated" for quite some time. I think she may have specified three years, but how the hell can I be sure? I hated listening to her! How are you supposed to take ANYTHING seriously when everybody talks like redneck hillbillies? It's a space movie for crying out loud! Anyway, space travel has very little to do with time travel, I think.
Introducing the cast as I see them.
Or is time in space different because you're technically not revolving around the Sun, which is how we measure time?
Doesn't matter. My take on this is that I want somebody to grant me the Serenity as a gift. Like, the actual ship. Why?
If I had the Spaceship Serenity, I would turn it into a giant time machine. Then I would travel around from time to time, wreaking havoc and mayhem where ever I happened to travel. Imagine the horrible ways in which I could alter the pages of history simply by flirting with Henry VIII before he married Catherine of Aragon. Muah ha haa. <--- That's my evil laugh, by the way.
Or imagine what would happen if I went back to just before the fools in Charleston fired on Fort Sumter and instead I marched and fired a round at the soldiers inside... They wouldn't know what to make of it, would they?
Of course not. History would be baffled for centuries to come.
I could do a lot of damage to History if someone were to grant me Serenity. Which is probably why nobody has, and I think it's unfair.