My friend J-Lynn has recently become a fan of Atypical Read on Facebook.
I have mixed feelings about this development. (No offense, Scott. It's not that I don't like sharing your brilliance with the world.)
On the one hand, I love that through my Facebook she found the blog that she now, apparently, adores. Every blogger wants more readers. She reads. Maybe she'll start leaving comments. Eventually reading comments.
And that leads to my dislike of it.
I dot not like the idea of people I know reading my blog. Except Padawan and my sisters. My blog is an expression of myself outside of the realm of social standards. I can say and do whatever I want and nobody says anything about it. Nobody on here reads something and then says, "Chanel, have you considered that you're obsessive compulsive?" or "Chanel, do you maybe think you're a little cynical?" or "Chanel, you do realize that you're completely insane and flamingos and crickets are actually NOT trying to kill you, don't you?" I am not judged here. And while J-Lynn and I have grown up together and we know everything about each other, I like having one space of my life to myself. I share my sisters with her, my friends, even my coworkers know and occasionally hang out with her! And I don't mind that. Really, I don't.
But my blogging community is something that is mine. (Sorry, you guys. I kind of forgot to tell you that you all belong to me.)
By her reading Atypical Read, she may eventually read a comment I left, follow the link to my profile, and thereby discover my blog. Granted, she knows this blog exists, but I never told her the title and to the best of my knowledge she's never found it. This is MY realm. My one bit of personal space that doesn't touch my work life (unless I complain about it) or my friends. (Except Patrick, but I never really knew him in person so I don't really think that counts, and anyway he rarely comments so it doesn't matter.)
Some of you are actually friends on my Facebook (and that all started because I liked a page and then BAM! I was found), and you've probably noticed that I never post links to Fabulously Neurotic. Not once.
I like having most every reader being someone I met through the Blogosphere. There's a feeling of community and acceptance and damn it, none of you call my dog a rat and I love that! Also, none of you have insulting nicknames for Padawan. J-Lynn and Padawan, unfortunately, had a massive falling out over an asshole who ended his friendship with Padawan because I wouldn't end my friendship with J-Lynn. Apparently he just couldn't be friends with someone who could love someone who is friends with someone like J-Lynn. No, even if you follow the convolutions that still doesn't make sense.
Am I the only one out there that feels this way? I keep my life pretty compartmentalized because...well, I don't know why. I just keep everything separated certain ways. So this could just me being neurotic. Or maybe I'm not alone in this?