At the Vet

TuesdayBrat was supposed to get married, but she changed her mind (because of me, I have confirmed) and so all I had to do was take Choo Choo to the vet for her shots and check up. The appointment was scheduled for ten in the morning, so I told work I'd be in by noon instead of taking the whole day off.

Well, it's a good thing I set that up. I didn't expect to be in that late. But I hadn't really expected on having to go home to wash myself off and change my clothes. I assumed I'd be in by eleven at the latest. And if Choo Choo's vet wasn't in Cedar Park, I could have been in by ten thirty regardless.

Back to the story...Choo Choo and I waited for twenty minutes in Exam Room 1 because we were early. (Padawan waited in the car because he doesn't like going inside.) When the technician came in (sort of like a medical assistant at a doctor's office, she comes in to ask questions before the vet comes in) she asked me the usual questions: has she been eating, sleeping, drinking, playing like normal? Coughing, sneezing? 

"She's been fine."

"Have you noticed anything unusual?"

"Actually, yes. I checked her teeth a few days ago and I think her Greenies aren't cleaning her teeth properly because of her overbite. Do I need to schedule her for a cleaning? Also, she's been chewing at the base of her tail obsessively. She's actually gnawed a bald spot on the side. I was wondering if there was something wrong?"

"Does she have allergies?"

"Yes."

"Do you treat her for them?"

"1/4 a Benadryl  a day."

"Does it help?" 

"Yeah. Takes care of the sneezing and watery eyes."

"Does she drag herself across the carpet?"

"No."

"Well, little dogs often have trouble with their anal sacs building up fluid. We can take care of that and she'll stop biting her tail."

So they took Choo Choo into the back and did what they needed to do, plus clipped her nails because she won't let me do that. When they brought her back in she immediately jumped in my lap as the vet came in (it wasn't Dr. Spacey because he doesn't work on Tuesdays, it was a new one) and he said, "Her sacs were extremely full." At that, I felt something warm and wet on my leg.

I moved Choo Choo. 

Huge wet spot on my jeans where she'd been sitting. Anal sac fluid. On my jeans. Oh god.

It took a lot of self control to not jump up and freak out. But I held it in.

Oh, God. Anal fluid on my jeans! Will this come out? How many times will I have to wash these before it's safe again? Should I throw them away? No! These are my favorite skinny jeans! I can't just toss them out!

Then the Vet asked, "You're concerned about her teeth?" and started examining her mouth. Well that distracted me. "On a scale of 1 to 4, 1 being the best and 4 being the worst, Choo Choo's teeth are a 1. It's surprising. She's almost three?"

I nodded. 

"Very surprising. A lot of small dogs have teeth problems early on. You've been doing really well. You use Greenies?"

Another nod.

"Well, if you're concerned they're not as effective as they could be, you could try these. They're raw hide with the same enzymes in them as the Greenies, but they're harder to chew. They last longer, and they scrape away buildup better. It might help, or you could try brushing her teeth with a brush and toothpaste."

"Ah...no. We've tried that. She broke three toothbrushes. We'll try the rawhide chews."

Then he started examining her legs and knees. She just sat there and let him do his thing. She licked his hands every time she got the chance. "You know, she's a remarkably well behaved Chihuahua. Have you had her since she was a puppy?"

"Yes, I got her when she was six weeks old."

"Did you send her to a trainer?"

"No."

"You've done a good job socializing her. She's friendly and calm. She's not even growling."

Ah, I glowed with motherly pride. I love to hear people comment on what a good dog I've raised. "Well, I've got a really big family. She's used to people. Her problem isn't loving people. It's barking to get their attention when she sees them in the distance."

"Does she bark a lot inside?"

"Only when someone comes to the door."

A cat meowed outside the Exam Room. Choo Choo turned to face the door, wagged her tail and whined desperately. Vet looked at me. "She wants to play with the cat."

"She likes cats?"

"Yes. I think she thinks she is one."

"Very interesting. Do you have a cat?"

"No. I used to, but not anymore."

"Other dogs?" 

"We used to have a Sheltie, but someone stole him a couple of weeks after we got her."

"She's an only child then. Happy girl, aren't you, Choo Choo?" She licked his hand and wagged her tail and rolled over so he could scratch her belly. My dog is a glutton for petting. "She's so unusual for a Chihuahua. She's not even shaking."

"She's a good dog."

"Where did you get her?"

"From a breeder in Manor."

"She registered?"

"Yup. CKC." 

"Well, I guess she's so well adjusted because she's well loved, then. It proves anything with possible with a dog if the right person raises them." 

I smiled and said thank you. Then he had to give her the shots and nose spray she desperately needed. Choo Choo doesn't particularly enjoy shots, but she knows to hold still for them. She absolutely does not, however, like the nose spray being shoved up her nose. She fought that one (no barking, growling, or biting, though) and snorted when it was done. Then she looked at him like, "What the hell was that for? I thought we were friends!"

"You're a good girl, Choo Choo. We'll see you in April for your surgery."  He gave her treat and a pat on the head and then we went to pay our bill. For the record, Choo Choo was negative for worms, heart worms,  and other parasites. Also she doesn't have diabetes. Her knees and back are healthy. She has no hip problems. She still has a ridiculous overbite, but it's part of her charm.

I've washed my jeans three times. I'm almost sure I can wear them again. I think maybe one more trip in the washer might be enough to overcome my desire to not touch them..

Right when I got home my boss called. He'd forgotten I was taking Choo Choo to the Vet so he was checking to see why I was late. When I called back he was busy so I left a message with the receptionist to tell him that Choo Choo's appointment had run late because they had to do an anal sac cleanse and it had gotten on my jeans and I needed to change and clean up before coming to work.

When I walked in the door the guys were like, "Jazz said you were running late because of something about anal sex?"

Men are such pigs.