The CS-FIG

I've recently developed an appreciation affinity addiction to The Big Bang Theory.

I know that a lot of people don't like it, but then again most people don't have any real life people who bear a striking resemblance, personality wise, to the characters. When I watch The Big Bang Theory I'm not just watching a show. I'm taken back to my college days and the time I spent with the Computer Science Freshman Interest Group, or the CS-FIG, as we were called.

Yeah. I wasn't actually a Computer Science major but they adopted me as their "honorary member." My name was on the roster and everything. Not just because I was a pretty girl that liked to hang out with and talk to them without needing their help, but because I am a fairly awesome person. That's not narcissistic. That's just true. I'm fun and funny and charming when I'm comfortable and not feeling awkward.

When I first went off to college I decided the best thing to do would be to get what I called "filler friends", or people who would fill up my time during the week to keep me entertained until I could see my real friends, the ones I'd grown up with, on weekends. I decided after some thought that my filler friends should be nothing like my real friends. I wasn't looking for replacements.

I really tried to find people who fit the "filler" requirements. Average people who hadn't graduated in the top fifteen percent of their classes who majored in Psychology (the most common major on campus because it's an easy ride) were my main target. But I hated them. The girls were shallow, stupid, and catty. They only liked to talk about other girls and couples and trying to explain to them why they found me in my room curled up with Tolstoy was pointless.

I tried hanging out with guys who were "filler" material. That was even worse than the girls. The guys were either entirely too interested in getting in my pants to make me comfortable enough to hang out, or they were only nice until they thought they had a shot, at which point I would turn them down and move on. I was absolutely not interested in picking up a new boyfriend.

I even tried a few frat parties during Rush with my roommate, who I actually got along with, to see if that would be a tolerable way to pass my time. Since I didn't drink all I could do was watch other people act like morons while getting drunk while trying to keep drunk frat boys and not yet frat boys from hitting on me or touching me.

Needless to say, finding "filler friends" failed and I had resigned myself to only hanging out with Cookie, the one friend who actually made the transfer from high school to college with  me, and when he was busy I decided I would just go to the library and make use of my time or hang out with my roommate.

I actually met the CS-FIG through Cookie, who lived in the same building as them, just three floors under. Cookie himself was a Computer Science Major, and he received an invitation to blow up a bottle of Big Red one night while we were hanging out. When he explained that he was hanging out with a friend, Neutron told him to "go ahead and bring him along."

Maybe Cookie should have warned them that "him" was actually a "her" because when I walked into the CS-FIG lounge with him and he introduced me there was a stunned silence. And then everybody came over and we all introduced ourself and I shook lots of hands and answered a lot of questions before we all finally went down to the park on campus and put shock tarts in a 2 liter of big red and watched it explode with a big BANG!

I found myself with a set of real friends instead of "filler friends" who happily called me every night to remind me of whatever was planned for the evening, or on the few nights that I didn't go to them, they came to me and either hung out in my room with me (my roommate never hung those nights: she said they made her feel stupid) or took me away to wherever they had planned to go anyway.

My favorite two members of the CS-FIG (aside from Cookie, obviously) were Adamantium and Neutron. If they were in the Big Bang Theory and were physicists, Adamantium would be Sheldon (albeit, a much more friendly, less condescending version of Sheldon) and Neutron would have been Leonard.

Adamantium and Neutron took it upon themselves to teach me some things about computers. My typing abilities easily outstripped their own: they weighed in at a paltry 85 and 90 WPM respectively, but that was pretty much my limit with computers aside from knowing how to use Power Point, Word, and Excel.  Everything I know about HTML coding I learned from the two of them, and two prouder teachers there never were as when they gave me the chance to show the other guys what I had learned. They also taught me how to design a webpage, though why they thought I would ever need to know that, I have no idea.

There was one painful two week period in which they decided to try to teach me how to code with Java. To their utter disappointment (Adamantium's more than Neutron's) I failed completely. I couldn't grasp the concept, and I wasn't interested in it enough to push past the difficulties involved. They finally had to admit defeat when they left me a note on the white board on my dorm while I was out one day in what they thought was fairly basic Java.

When I called Neutron he answered, "Hey! You understood it! You're getting better!"

And I said, "No, that's why I'm calling you! What the hell did you write on my board? I only understood my name!"

Apparently it had been instructions to call one of them. That was probably not a good idea. I felt bad for disappointing them. Adamantium was extremely disappointed and decided my lessons in Java should be postponed indefinitely. I heartily seconded the motion, and Neutron had to give in since I was no longer a will pupil.

After a while I developed a crush on Neutron, who was easiest to talk to and also my most frequent companion. Unfortunately, he was so into his computers and talking about the great game he was programming that he didn't really have an interest in women. That or he just didn't realize it and kept his own attraction hidden because he didn't know I liked him. You know what? I like the second option better.

We all went to Ren Fest together. We went to gaming tournaments together. (I occasionally dressed up with them, but I never played. I prefer watching other's play video games to joining in myself.) We went to movies together, had Star Wars Marathons. They did try to talk me into going to a Star Trek Marathon but I put my foot down on that one because I am not a Trekkie and I can't stand being around people when they're speaking Klingon. Yeah. They all spoke Klingon. (I'm not even sure if Klingon is a real thought out language or if they just learned different phrases from watching the show) And two of them spoke Elvish. As in the language that  Tolkien invented when he was writing Lord of the Rings. I didn't even realize it was a real language and not just a bunch of gibberish he wrote for the sake of his novels until I met the guys. I was interested enough to ask about that one and they even taught me a greeting.

I even got to impress them all once when I quoted the poem from the book. "Three Rings for the  Elven Kings under the sky, seven for the dwarf lords in their halls of stone, nine for mortal men doomed to die, one for the Dark Lord on his dark throne in the land of Mordor where the Shadows lie. One ring to rule them all, one ring to find them, one ring to bring them all and in  the darkness bind them in the land of Mordor where teh Shadows lie."

So...alright, it was pretty nerdy that I actually knew the poem. But I had read LOTR and I remembered that poem specifically because it had been chopped down for the movie and I thought it was so much more powerful with all of the words. Hollywood changes whatever it wants to with no actual consideration for the literary integrity of the work they are representing. So sad.

Anyway, I even played D&D with them, though I had played D&D in high school. That really amused them.

"No offense, but you don't look like the kind of girl who knows how to play D&D."

"Pshaw. Haven't you heard of me? I roll twenties."

Some of my fondest memories in my life happened in the company of those awesome, sweet tempered, lovable, respectful gentlemen. And they only reaffirmed my belief that as far as friends and boyfriends go, Nerds are the best to have.