Saturday, July 2, 2011

Taco sauce...

It's just one of those Anti-Facebook days.

"If you cross the North Korean border illegally, you get twelve years hard labor. If you cross the Afghanistan border illegal, you get...shot. If you cross the US border illegally, you get a job, a driver's license, food stamps, a place to live, free health care, housing subsidies and child benefits, education, and tax free business for seven years. No wonder we are a country in debt. Re-post if you agree!"

I love my older sister...but she is seriously ignorant when it comes to the way the world actually works. I hate it when people (my sisters especially) post things like this on their Facebook where I have to look at it. If you're going to be political, you should probably know what you're talking about, right?

But...you know...

I also hate those religious posts, too.

"Our God is an awesome God! Thank you for redeeming me, Lord, and setting me free."

"Because the Sovereign LORD helps me, I will not be disgraced. Therefore have I set my face like flint, and I know it will not be put to shame. ---Isaiah 50:17 AMEN!"

"Praise the LORD. Give thanks to the LORD, for he is good; his love endures forever. --Psalm 106:1, Psalm 118:1, Psalm 136:3, 1 Chronicles 16:34"

"Thanks be to God, who delivers me through Jesus Christ our Lord! --Romans 7:25."

These are all from the same person on the same day within minutes of each other. It's not that I have a problem with religion. I don't. You are free to believe or not believe as you see fit. I don't care. But I don't want to have my feed spammed with quotes from the Bible. I mean, this person would probably be highly offended if I started posting several times a day exactly why I don't believe in God and why religion is stupid. Wouldn't it make sense that he not offend me five or six times a day with his beliefs? I'm not being mean. I'm just saying that one quote a day is more than enough for all of us nonbelievers.

And then...you know...

My sister posts this: "Your belief in God is merely an escape from your monotonous, stupid and cruel life." 

Not that I'm saying that to any of you. She did it right after both our feeds got clogged with Bible verses to prove a point. And it was pretty damn funny if you ask me. I'm only sad she got the chance to do it first. 

And then there are the people who post twenty pictures of their children a day doing ordinary things and then they beg for comments. Do they realize who they are talking to?

Yes, post on my wall that you want me to see the new picture of your kid watering the freaking rose bushes.

Oh, wow. That's so amazing! I never would have guessed any spawn of your womb would develop the mental capacity to understand that plant growth is directly related to being watered daily! She does her manual labor so well, too. She has a shining future ahead of her in gardening and landscaping for other people for the rest of her life. You must be so proud.

You can imagine that wouldn't go over well.

I say nothing instead. But let me just make it clear: if I want to comment on the pictures of your children doing normal things, I will go there myself and leave a damn comment. Otherwise...I am so NOT interested. Unless in exchange you'd like to go and comment on every single picture I put on my Facebook of Choo Choo? She's my furry child, after all. Comment on my kids (no matter their species), I comment on yours (no matter how stupid, ugly, or untalented). It seems fair.  But then...I find that people who have the nerve to send messages and wall posts demanding comments on pictures of their average children are rarely moved by such paltry devices as logic and fairness. 

That being said...

*sigh*

I hurt my neck last week...somehow. I am pleased to say, however, that after a night of sleeping with my neck in a neck pillow to prevent movement I have regained some range of movement. I can turn my head about thirty degrees to the right or left without pain. Any further, though, and it still hurts.

23 comments:

  1. Facebook can either be a lot of fun, or a cesspool of needy people who seriously believe that everyone in the world actually gives a crap about every insignificant detail of their lives. Pictures begging for comments are bad enough, but I maintain that amongst the most annoying Facebookers are the people who post several status updates per day. Seriously? I don't freaking care!

    However, I would like to offer one thing even worse than people who post more than one status update per day: People who "Like" their own status! DUH! Of COURSE you like your status! YOU POSTED IT!!!

    Lunatics.

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  2. Aw...I put up more than one status update a day sometimes...but they're generally snarky comments about stupid customers.

    I have never liked my own status though.

    People do that? That's so weird...Why would you do that? Self validation?

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  3. You just said everything I think on a daily basis when I look at my FB feed.

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  4. I actually saw that status from your sister that you mention at the top. Your response was dead on, but I couldn't tell you that because I'm not friends with your sister and, according to Facebook's complicated rules, the status showed up on my feed, but yet wouldn't let me comment. I could only observe from the sideline. I wanted to say something like "You're probably too smart for your family." Now, THAT probably wouldn't have gone over well. Perhaps we should trust Facebook in its infinite wisdom for restricting me. Yay verily. Amen.

    Also, people post pictures of their kid on your wall??? That's pretty obnoxious. I could see them uploading pictures of their kids and it showing up on your feed...but your wall? Of course, my daughter says there's a thing now where girls will post a picture of themselves, and then tag every guy they're friends with just so that the picture shows up on their wall. Kind of the same thing, I guess. At any rate, the "watering plants" thing made me laugh. People always think that everyone else is going to find every mundane thing that their kids do as fascinating as they find it themselves.

    Finally...if I might ask..."Taco Sauce"????

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  5. It seems to be something happening more frequently...Facebookers are getting obnoxious.

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  6. Bryan, my sister is too smart for my family?

    No, not the pictures. They post that they WANT me to comment on the new pictures, or they send me a message. Like what people used to do on Myspace. "I have new pictures up! Go comment please!"

    I'd just block them if they had the nerve to put pictures of children on my wall.

    Yeah, I can water rose bushes, too. Does that make it freaking awesome? No. It's a damn rose bush. It's not rocket science.

    Taco sauce. It's what I say when I'm frustrated and I can't think of a better swear.

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  7. No, YOU are too smart for your family. The comment would have been directed at you.

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  8. Also, sending you messages asking you to comment on their photos sounds even worse.

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  9. Oh, I thought you were being sarcastic. Yeah, my family has been saying that since I was in second grade. The running joke is that I'm the milk man's daughter.

    It's only relatives that send messages begging for comments. I suppose they think because we're related I should have an interest in their children.

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  10. Yes, I've seen several people "like" their own status. I have to roll my eyes and virtually shun them for a few days. It's annoying as all get out, I can tell you!

    I won't judge you for posting more than one status update in one day. Especially as it's commentary on what's actually going on with annoying customers. I would find that to be quite entertaining.

    Some people just seem to think that every tiny little thought that enters their mind is post-worthy. THAT is what's annoying to me.

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  11. You mean like...

    "My butt itches."

    I have a friend that posts that at least once a week, and sometimes I just want to facepalm her.

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  12. I have a few friends who live together and you can always tell when one of them has left their FB open and unprotected because the bum/poo status get posted. From that crew it makes me laugh.

    I totally understand the over posting of some people. Its the baby ones that bother me the most.....JR just took a large poo poo on the pot....JR can wash his hands....JR blah blah
    I DONT CARE!

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  13. My favorites are, "JR just slammed his door in my face. When did my children become so ungrateful?"

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  14. *Giggling* Something like that. :)

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  15. I dropped FB when I started having some major issues (like I didn't always have them) and found myself screaming at somebody's post. "That's the ugliest child I have ever seen! Did you find him stuck to your shoe somewhere and decide to keep him?" I realized that 99% of my instant thoughts about most people's posts were "Go frack yourself" and decided that FB was not for me.

    If you don't mind, I think I'll borrow "Taco Sauce". It would fit in well with my other comments.

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  16. I put up pictures of my kid, but I try to limit it to about once per week (and anyway, it's okay because my kid is the cutest in the world). But I'm not going to go around telling people I put up the pic. I also don't tell everyone when my butt itches.

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  17. Candice, yes I thought so.

    Rev, you are welcome to borrow taco sauce. It's a very good swear. But you really should yell at your computer screen. It might think you hate it and then fail you. (True story.)

    Doug, you do have a cute kid, true. And it's good you don't go around begging for comments. You should harass people who do, though. Just because you're a parent and you know there's a limit. And thank you for not telling me when your butt itches. Or your balls. I hear balls get itchy a lot.

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  18. I've had a long talk with my computer screen and it knows not to take the things I say personally. We have an understanding.

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  19. As long as your computer understands. They are highly sensitive beings, you know.

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  20. All Facebook users should admit that it's a fairly selfish exercise in bragging and selfishness. I see a lot of "I'm so depressed right now" kinds of statuses, followed by pages of comments telling that person to keep their chin up. Does that kind of thing actually help people be less depressed?

    Facebook is weird.

    And I thought of darev, when you said Taco Sauce is your replacement swear. It's a good one and I'm glad he stole it.

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  21. I just ignore the ones about being depressed. If they were really depressed they'd call one person and not impersonally post it on the internet for fifty people. Or a hundred fifty. Or whatever the number of "friends" on their page.

    Yes. I only use Taco Sauce when I am beyond a straight forward word. Like when I say "Jerkface" it's because I can't think of a bad enough word.

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  22. You're right. If they were really depressed, they probably wouldn't be on Facebook at all. Just goes to my point of the selfishness of it all.

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  23. Twitter, I imagine since I don't have one and never will, is probably much worse.

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