Saturday, October 23, 2010

There is absolutely nothing relevant to anything in this blog. You should probably burn it.

For the sake of preventing spam (which is code for wanting to irritate the hell out of anyone who wants to leave a comment) I've changed my settings to require a word verification for comments. I did this yesterday because I finally figured out how to do it and I've seen it on other blogs. I'm not particularly worried about spam. I just wanted to do it to see how it works out. It might actually end up irritating everybody. I'm not entirely sure. If it does, let me know so I can consider changing it back. (I have to say consider because it would never do to let you believe I'd give you whatever you wanted immediately. You'd get all ego happy about it.)

Anyway, bored out of my mind yesterday, I decided to try this stupid thing called "Fang Yourself", where you pretty much take a picture of yourself and add fangs and paler skin and some blood and make yourself into a vampire. I knew it would be stupid, but I was insanely bored. So I tried it. And it was even dumber  than I ever imagined it could be, which was pretty dumb to begin with, and I should not have been surprised. And I was not. But when you reach a certain level of boredom, doing something stupid is entirely preferable to doing absolutely nothing, and I'd forgotten my Kindle, so I had only the internet. And StumbleUpon was failing my preferences yesterday. So I SERIOUSLY had nothing else.


Anyway, because the results were so varyingly ridiculous I thought I'd share the laughter.

First picture was the funniest, I think. See the bloodthirsty look in my obviously fake eyes? Rawr?

I obviously had to throw some blood on my face for good measure. What kind of vampire isn't dripping with the blood of slaughter, after all? The hair obviously isn't mine. I used a picture I had saved from a make over website I had used to test different hair colors on my hair before actually dying my hair. But, you know, this would have been so much more fun if the mouths weren't so obviously photoshopped on. It's impossible to find a mouth to fit exactly right on my face because I have such an odd shape, something between heart and oval.

This was the second one. Seriously, after I made my vampire faces the website asked me what kind of vampire I was: sensual, old school, day walker, noble, feral, rock star, psychic, or romantic. Well, that was as far as I wanted to take the whole thing because, honestly, it's just a picture and I'm not about to go on and make up a name and a coven and a back story for a picture I made when I was bored out of my mind.

But I did go and make a picture of one of my friends because I personally thought she'd look really wicked as a vampire. The result was horrifying, and you will see why. 

Made you jump, didn't it? 

She's actually not that creepy looking in person. I edited this picture months ago to show her what she would look like if she was related to Marilyn Manson. All I had to do to this picture was add fangs and blood and the red silk sheet for background and change the eye color. But it's quite effective, isn't it? 

So I did three pictures and it took an hour and a half of my time yesterday, and then I was bored with Fanging Myself and Other People, so I wrote a note to Padawan and considered cleaning my desk off.

Of course I didn't because every time I try to clean my desk it spirals out of control and then I clean the filing cabinet and take out the trash and organize the papers and then I vacuum around my desk and then I move the plastic thing for my rolling chair out from under my desk and I vacuum that part of the carpet and pretty soon I'm dusting everything, too. And it turns into a big complicated pile of nothing and I feel like I've wasted an entire day of potential awesomeness by cleaning at work.

Now that I've effectively blogged about absolutely nothing, I think I'll go bury my head under my jacket and pout about having to work late because of Inventory tonight. 


  1. Interesting pictures...And indeed your friend's picture wins the "freaky" award.

    So far as the word verification, I don't think that most people really mind it all that much. I know I don't. Just do what you need to do, it's your blog! :)

  2. I showed her the picture. She told me if she ever decided to join a satanic cult and had to fill out an application, she'd probably put this picture on the application. She got a good laugh out of it.

    I'm glad you're not irritated by it because I really can't remember exactly how I changed it in the first place.

  3. No link to the lame vampire site? I love lame sites like that, and I am too lazy to google for it. So now I will never know what I look like as a vampire. Sad.


    There you go, Doug. But I want pictures if you're going to vampire yourself. It's only fair.


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