Padawan tossed a wretched accusation at me a few moments ago which, to be perfectly honest, really hurt my feelings.
He accused me of having a shoe obsession.
And compared me to Carrie Bradshaw.
Don't get me wrong. When Relly calls me "a total Carrie", it's a compliment. I have an amazing closet and my sisters love to come over and play dress up and borrow things. (Which I reclaim. There is no borrowing forever in my world. I always get my things back.) She's says it with a mixture of admiration and envy. Because, let's face it, my clothes are pretty freaking awesome, and my shoes are always fun. Do I own a lot? Yes. But I wear every single thing multiple times in multiple ways. So when my sisters joke that I'm the Austin romantic/hippy version of Carrie Bradshaw, it feels nice.
The way Padawan said it?
He said it more like it was a disease.
I have a lot of shoes, but I don't feel like I'm obsessed with them. I buy shoes, I wear them. I rock them. When they break, I either have them fixed or I replace them. It's not like I'm just uselessly accumulating piles of shoes here and then refusing to throw them out. If they aren't fixable and aren't wearable, they go in the trash. If I stop wearing them because I no longer love them, they go in the bag for donation. I clean everything out...oh, every three months or so.
Wouldn't call that an obsession, would you?
So I'll level with you. Right at this very moment in time, I own thirty one pairs of shoes. Sixteen pairs of boots, one pair of running shoes, two pairs of house slippers, three pairs of flats, eight pairs of heels in varying heights and styles, and one pair of flip flops because, apparently, everyone needs a pair of those in this state. (And for the record, of those sixteen pairs of boots, absolutely NONE are cowboy/cowgirl boots. Not. A. Single. Pair.) No, thirty one pairs of shoes isn't really a big number...
I mean, I have a coworker, who is male, that owns sixty pairs of shoes. Or, he was a coworker but he quit. Granted, he has a very specific kind of shoe. He only owns Chucks. I'd consider that an obsession. Me? I have a range! For different outfits! Different looks! It's a fashion thing, not an obsession.
The day I start sacrificing things like health insurance, toothpaste, and food in order to buy shoes is the day you can brand me obsessed. In the meantime...I'm just someone who likes pretty things. I own over fifty pairs of earrings, but you don't hear anybody harping on about that because they're earrings. They're in a jewelry box on top of my dresser and they don't take up a lot of space. It's only an obsession to other people when they get in someone's way.
Well, he's made his little demand. We're going to clean out some of the clutter tomorrow.
But not ONE PAIR of shoes is going.
Not a single one.
Maybe a pair of jeans.
My wife has a bunch of shoes too. The female fixation with owning multiple pairs of shoes is a mystery to us men, but it's one mystery that I don't trouble my head over too much.
ReplyDeleteAt the moment I own three pairs of shoes and even that seems excessive to me. I only got one of the pairs because there was a two for one sale and I figured I'd get some boots for winter.
See, Padawan has EIGHT pairs of shoes. In the male world, I'm pretty sure that's way past normal. I think normal for guys is three pairs.
DeleteI will have to admit right now that I have absolutely no idea who Carrie Bradshaw is. Must be one of those reality show generation things. Whenever I accuse my wife of having too many shoes I always compare her to Imelda Marcos.
ReplyDeleteAnyway.
I wouldn't call you "obsessed." I think I would refer to you as "Well-accessorized."
Or I might just call you a closet hog. (grin)
So, Carrie Bradshaw is the character Sarah Jessica Parker brought to life in Sex and the City. She's the narrator journalist with the severe substance abuse problem. (Her substance being expensive shoes.) Sex and the City is not a reality show. It's based on a newspaper article.
DeleteAs for the closet...he gets one quarter of the space.
Yep. Lost to me. Wife has shoes in plastic boxes, like they were being displayed at a shoe museum no one, but me, will ever see. Never worn. Just...THERE. As for myself, I have a few pair of converse (My leather ones being my favorite)that I have, but far from any obsession. And if it helps, I think you make a better CB than SJP any day.
ReplyDeleteWell I don't have any shoes that I've never worn...I wonder why she bought them if she didn't want to wear them? Perhaps she decided they were too cute to mess up...But then they'd also be the kind that are too cute not to wear...Maybe she bought them and then hated them but didn't want to take them back because...she doesn't like returning things?
DeleteAlright, your wife's shoe museum of never worn shoes baffles me, too.
Your shoe collection seems perfectly reasonable to me. I agree with your statement: Padawan only said you had an obsession because he's annoyed by how much space they're taking in the closet. Rude! Stick to your guns, and don't get rid of any of those shoes! They deserve their closet space!
ReplyDeleteFREEDOM!!! Power to the shoes! :)
Oh, I stuck to my guns! I didn't send away a single pair of shoes. They all got nice new storage compartments so that they don't have to worry about not having a place to go. Nothing like the elaborate setup Scott's wife has, of course. You can't see them in their compartments. BUT, they have their own little home. And I also gained more closet space, but gave up two drawers of my dresser in exchange. (My clothes need closet space more than a dresser. I prefer to let my clothes hang.)
DeleteAnd I'm saying this as a non-shoe collecting shopping-hater: I honestly don't think 30 is a big deal. I thought you were going to say like 100 or something. 16 pairs of boots sounds like a lot at first glance, but then I started thinking about it: ankle boots, knee-highs, heeled boots, flats, black boots, brown boots, gray boots, riding boots, combat boots (what? It could happen), etc. I don't think you need snow boots in Texas. I could be wrong. Oh, rain boots. And then there are boots for jeans, boots for skirts, boots for dresses. So when you do the math, it's not really that much.
ReplyDeleteBut I only have one pair of boots. And they made me fall down the stairs the other day (true story). So the moral of all this boot arithmetic is...I really need some bloody boots.
The end.
I don't own snow boots (because it only snows like once every two years) combat boots (what would I wear them with?) or hiking boots (which you didn't mention, but Padawan did say the other day that when we go to Yosemite for our vacation, I will need a pair of hiking boots.) I do own rain boots, and I didn't even want them but I had to get them because I walk to work and sometimes it's raining and I don't like wet feet.
DeleteAs for your boot problem, I don't know what kind of boots you've got, but I totally recommend riding boots. They are my latest favorite in the world of boots. Stylish, comfortable, and practical, especially if you plan on going riding after a day of looking fabulous!