Friday, October 14, 2011

They should give me a raise for not dropping an F-bomb when I found them.

You guys want to know what I do at work all day?


I spend my days looking for my shoes.

Why were my shoes glued to the ceiling?

Because I broke them on my way to work and left them on Dizzy's workbench for repair, and he didn't like the way I filled out my repair tag. So he glued my shoes to the ceiling. Took me ten minutes to find the stupid things, and another fifteen to figure out how to get them down.

They don't pay me enough for this.

Now you guys can understand my lack of writing lately. How can one write without shoes on one's feet?

21 comments:

  1. Don't me mad, but I think I like Dizzy.

    ReplyDelete
  2. It's okay. I hid his shoes while I was looking for mine. I got some pay back.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Cute shoes. :)

    Well, you can't say they don't keep you on your toes (no pun intended) around that place! I'm glad you didn't drop the f-bomb, although it probably would have been warranted in this case...

    ReplyDelete
  4. I'm exploring the world of flats this year. They're so fabulous to work in all day. Nice and comfy!

    Well nobody expects to go pick up their shoes from repair to find them missing and someone taunting you to find them...and f-bomb or two would not have been unreasonable.

    ReplyDelete
  5. Isn't this all your fault for filling out the tag wrong in the first place? I think Dizzy might have a point here. (he says with a wink and a nod...)

    Now get back to work and write some good stories.

    ReplyDelete
  6. I write without shoes on my feet all the time. Sometimes I'm not even wearing pants.

    Hmmm, maybe I've said too much.

    ReplyDelete
  7. I don't leave anything laying around unguarded at work. There's no telling what those lunatics will do next. And I'm not talking about the inmates! You wouldn't believe some of the ridiculous crap I have found in my lunchbox at the end of the day.

    ReplyDelete
  8. Brent, I filled out the repair tag to the best of my ability while cutting corners. So what if I used descriptions instead of an actual address and my nickname instead of my full name...and alright, I wrote down the work number instead of cell, but he knew those anyway. I think this was a little overboard for a half assed repair tag.

    Bryan, I like to wear my Diva slippers when I'm typing. Other articles of clothing are irrelevant. Just the slippers matter.

    Rev, like what? I imagine you could find some pretty interesting things in a prison to hide in someone's lunchbox. Inmate shoelaces? (Are inmates allowed shoelaces even?)

    ReplyDelete
  9. Yes, they get shoelaces. Outside the Hive, anyway. We don't put inmate stuff in other people's stuff. That's nasty. But I have found toilet paper, paper towels, rubber gloves, hole punches, rocks, bricks, the arms off of a chair and once a telephone in my lunchbox. Lunacy.

    ReplyDelete
  10. Your lunch box must be pretty big to be able to hold some of that stuff. A telephone plus one of those huge lunches you described?

    ReplyDelete
  11. They glued your shoes to the ceiling? That is, at once, brilliant, and HORRID! My god...maybe something interesting like that will happen to me when I leave the kitchen behind!

    Btw, I find the pink of your blog extremely compelling, but then, pink is gooooood :)

    ReplyDelete
  12. Well...Dizzy did the gluing, but everybody else stood and watched him do it. Except me. I was actually working.

    I thought this was pretty funny...after I got my shoes back. Looking for them wasn't very fun, though. Who thinks to look UP?

    I thank you for the compliment to my pink blog. It is very pink, and I love it. That's why I haven't changed it in forever. This one feels...perfect.

    ReplyDelete
  13. I had wondered if you'd been dancing on the ceiling again. Or gravity suddenly reversed itself in your office, but only in relation to shoes.

    ReplyDelete
  14. Sometimes my fellow officers take my lunch out and stick it in the fridge just so they can put large things in my lunch box. One time it was completely full of bricks and I almost ripped the handle off when I grabbed it.

    ReplyDelete
  15. That's why I always climbed up into something when playing hide and seek. No one looks up.

    ReplyDelete
  16. Joshua, I am not from the right generation to appreciate the art of dancing on the ceiling. Sadly, I was born too late into the eighties for that.

    Rev, pictures! Pictures! Or are you not allowed to take cameras to work?

    Charlie, hiding up is cheating when you're playing hide and seek! Short people often have a harder time climbing things.

    ReplyDelete
  17. Oh heavens no. No personal cameras allowed inside the fence.

    ReplyDelete
  18. 1) They look like cute shoes
    2) Sucks that you broke your shoes
    3) hahahahahaha

    ReplyDelete
  19. Rev, I didn't think so. If Padawan can't have cameras inside nerdville I suppose it would be silly for people to have cameras in prison. Draw a picture of the lunchbox surprises, then.

    Jenna, they are cute shoes. They weren't permanently broken. When I got them down he fixed them.

    ReplyDelete
  20. Best. Prank. Ever.

    Except that Jello mold prank from the Office, but I'm pretty sure that's become a cliche now. So points to Dizzy for originality.

    ReplyDelete
  21. Love the shoes. Hate the ceiling bit. I would have been out of my mind looking for them--would never have thought to look at the freakin' ceiling!

    ReplyDelete

My Shelfari Bookshelf

Shelfari: Book reviews on your book blog