Meet my nephews...
I can't decide if they're little terrors or absolute angels.
I suppose it depends on the day. And whether or not they're throwing themselves on the floor and screaming in the middle of the place I work because they want to play with the drums.
They can't say "Chanel" so they either call me "Neh-wee" or "Neh-wl."
Sometimes Relly will encourage them to throw in a spiteful "Aunt" before whatever name they use.
I glower at her.
I am not Aunt anything. I'm too young to be an aunt.
I don't have toys, but they like coming over to my apartment. They liked to watch Finding Nemo, and when TV fails to entertain them properly, they find amusement in Choo Choo's toy basket. What they find so entertaining about dog toys, I have no idea. But they get hours of enjoyment out of it.
They are scared of Choo Choo, a little bit. They like to pet her. But when she sits on their laps they scream. I think it scares them when they can feel her nails. (Fear of a five pound dog is tolerable in children. Not in my neighbor, who is still a spiteful, stupid Dog Kicking Bitch.)
We went out to lunch one day, and Uncle Padawan joined us. (I take a perverse pleasure in reminding them to call him Uncle. It makes me giggle to hear it.) Big L decided to sing his new favorite song.
"Doooo the funky lady! Doooo the funky lady!"
Well, it's hard without the tune.
Dude looks like a lady.
So I helpfully sang part of the song for him, so he could have the right words.
"Do me, do me, do me, do me,
Ooh, what a funky lady!
She like it, like it, like it, like that,
Ooh, he was a lady!
That! That! Dude looks like a lady!"
And he looked thoughtful for a moment, considering what I said, then turned to me and said, with great conviction, "No, I don't think that's right."
We couldn't help laughing. Could you keep a straight face? Of course you couldn't.
Then they (Double L) starting singing their absolute favorite of all time song.
"My first kiss went a little this! *smooch* And twist! *smooch smooch* And twist!"
Apparently it's a Ke$ha song. I like the "ooo-wee-ooo" parts best. They're kind of catchy. Like "D-I-N-O-S-A-U-R a dinosaur! And O-L-D M-A-N you're just an old man, hittin' on me what? You need a CAT Scan!"
I don't approve of Ke$ha, of course. Most of her music is awful. But I like the catchy songs.
Especially that one about brushing her teeth with a bottle of Jack. Cracks me up every time.
And speaking of booze...
Tomorrow night, Padawan and I are going to my friend's surprise birthday party. I'm telling you this because it's a themed party.
Beers from Around the World.
Don't tell anyone I said this, but somebody has seen way too many episodes of Mad Men. And it's the man I work with who happens to be throwing the party because she's his girlfriend. But don't tell anybody.
Anyway, we all got assigned countries to bring beer from. I was assigned Austria for some god-awful reason. So I traded someone else for England and then took a trip to Specs. Ever been in there? It's like a Temple of Booze. I've never see so much alcohol under one roof.
Of course, I really feel sorry for the two people who got assigned Korea and Vietnam. Specs didn't have any imported beers from either of them. Of course, there's more than one Specs in Austin (and if that doesn't tell you something about this city you should consider that the store we went to is the smallest location of several) so there's probably some at one of them. Still, I had a much easier time with England. (Didn't see any from Austria but did find some from Belgium. That's kind of similar, right?)
Good lord I am tired. I'm going to go to bed. Have to make sure I wake up on time because Clueless will be dropped off bright and early tomorrow morning to Padawan can shuttle her home. (Still no license. And by the way, it's a crime that she didn't get sent to jail and just got stuck in mandatory alcoholism classes. She should be punished, not pitied.)