Monday, July 26, 2010

The only proper response in these situations is *facepalm*

God only knows I've made some pretty silly errors in my life. For example, I managed to believe for most of my life that Frank Sinatra was black. Shocking, I know, but my conclusion was logical. I only ever saw pictures of Frank Sinatra with the Rat Pack, never by himself. Every time somebody pointed out that it was Frank Sinatra and the Rat Pack, the guy in the middle was black. The way I knew it worked was that the most important person (Frank Sinatra) is always in the middle of a picture. So I assumed that Sammy Davis Jr. was Frank Sinatra. It wasn't until last year that I realized my error (on my own) and I told my co-workers. They won't let me live it down, and they kindly explained that Sammy was in the middle because the photographer wanted the picture to be balanced.

And, honestly, my mix up with Sammy and Frank is nothing compared to two of my sisters. When I asked them who Frank Sinatra was, my older sister Rells answered that he was a Mexican, and one of my younger sisters, Britt Britt, said, "Wasn't that a band that played old music like Beethoven and Bach?" At least my reasoning was logical. There was a solid facepalm in there. At least I thought an actual member of the Rat Pack was Frank Sinatra. As for Britt Britt's answer about Bach...I don't know what the hell she was thinking. (This was also the same day that my older sister declared Helen Keller wrote the Diary of Anne Frank. Double facepalm.)

Today I realize why my co-workers facepalmed when I confessed my error. Because today, I facepalmed about fifty times in the last hour. A group of young people came in. I'm guessing they were around my age (I am twenty one, they were at least eighteen.) And like many people do in a music store, they picked up guitars and started playing.

Unlike most people, they started singing. Now, it didn't sound bad. It actually sounded good. But we're a music store, and it's really dumb to start playing mainstream pop when you come in. Look around you. Everybody is a metal head, except me. But even I don't dare play my girly pop music in the store. It's out of respect for everyone else. This is Austin, after all, and we pride ourselves on our music scene.

These Idiots were just DUMB.

First: singing Collide. *facepalm* Oh. Dear. God.
Second: singing Had a Bad Day. *facepalm* Seriously?
Third: Fucking up the lyrics to the Beatles "I wanna Hold Your Hand." For the record, it's "I can't hide" not "I get high." Morons.
Fourth: Bono SO did not do Lucy in the Sky better than the Beatles. What the FUCK were you thinking when you said that, you idiot?
Fifth: Yellow. *facepalm* You know how I know you're suicidal? You sing Coldplay at the top of your lungs in the middle of a clearly metal heavy music store.

Oh, there were lots of facepalms in there. But they really, REALLY took the cake with the last one I heard. And after I heard this, I just pulled out my iPod and put in my headphones and blocked them out. I couldn't take the idiocy anymore. I really couldn't.

"Do you guys know "Freefallin?"
"No. Who's it by?"
"It's this awesome new song by John Meyer."

*ultimate facepalm*

Holy. Fucking. Jumping. Jesus.

For real?

I thought Frank Sinatra was Sammy Davis Jr, okay. And even I know that this kid was a complete moron. Really? REALLY?

I like John Meyer, don't get me wrong on that. I love his voice, and I like his music, and we sometimes (albeit, rarely) listen to him in the store because the guys (all dedicated metal heads) like some of his songs. But...he did not write "Freefallin." Nobody wrote "Freefallin" for him to sing. His version is not the first release of "Freefallin."

Tom Petty and the Heartbreakers are responsible for that "awesome" song, and it's been a personal favorite of mine since I was a little girl. John Meyer did a cover of "Freefallin", and while I do like his version, it's doesn't even TOUCH what Tom Petty did with it. Not even a little bit.

We really should have thrown them out of the store.

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